Writers and illustrators unite! It’s competition time

We write it. They draw it.

BCN Mes is hosting a writer+illustrator competition this month that has me super excited. I’m not sure why, it just sounds like it could be a lot of fun.

If you would like to take part go to the Arroz Negro section on BCN Mes and sign up. You can sign up as, a writer looking for an illustrator, vice versa, or if you’re one of those lucky ones…. you know, the type who have friends, you and your writer/illustrator friend can register as a team.

The stories can be in Catalan, Castellano or English. If you’re one of the lonesome this is the time to start messaging other lonely hearts registered on the website to link up. You have until the 20th of October to register your team.

On the 21st of October each team will be given, a guideline, a genre, and a key word and graphic element that must be included in the story and accompanying illustrations.

Teams have until the 31st of October to submit their work. BCN Mes will then choose the best 8 teams and publish them in the November edition. A nice bit of publicity for your effort, and heaps of fun. You heard me. Heaps of fun!

Picture: Yoshi Sislay: One example in which I think the writer wouldn’t keep up with the illustrator.

La tela marinera

La Tela Marinera is the graffiti caption written on the title page of this blog, yet I’ve never known how to use it correctly.

Those days are behind me now. Thanks to Google. This is how to use this phrase (which roughly translates to ‘someone being f****d’, something being hard or being difficult.

He suspendido 4 asignaturas…….. tela marinera la que me espera con mis padres.
I’ve failed 4 subjects, hell awaits me with my parents (or my parents are going to give me hell)

Este vida tiene tela marinera (es muy difícil, o pesado o largo)
This life is hard.

Si, este vida tiene tela marinera. It is hard and I kinda feel like this young man here. Ever so so weary!

Ole Merce! Vamos a la calle

The Merce festival is here!

It’s Barcelona’s best street party, and it is completely free. Part of the reason this city is like no other.

Leave your worries at home, and get yourself to the streets. Don’t miss the lazer light show at the Sagrada Familia tonight, or all the good stuff which will be happening at Parc Ciutadella, Plaza Catalunya, the Raval and loads of other locations. Read the Merce programme here.

Last year I didn’t plan on doing much of the Merce. Yet in one weekend:
I watched Swan Lake performed in the night over the fountains of Parc Ciutadella. I played with an adorable ferret called Messi. I found an old friend putting up dreamlike inflatable illuminated sculptures in the park. I watched Pacman played out in lazer lights on the front of the council building in Jaume. We got singed and completely and deliciously terrified under the rain of fire that is the Correfoc (wear skin protecting thick clothes and sunglasses, that shit is crazy!). Then we danced under the fire department’s bizarre but very welcome ‘fire truck street shower’, and met a whole host of strange and funny people.

Adventures are waiting! See you in the streets.

Help fund a street art exhibition in Barcelona

MBPA (Mapping Barcelona Public Art) is raising funds to hold an exhibition showcasing Barcelona’s transient street art.

The event will map Barcelona’s street art according to Barrio, bringing together the artists and residents who create the distinctive character and mood which marks each neighborhood in Barcelona.

The exhibition titled Las Calles Hablan (The Streets Talk) is scheduled for the end of October but before that can happen, MBPA faces a huge challenge. It needs to raise 2,500 dollars by September 19th or the event won’t happen. If you believe in street art and would like to support this noncommercial art form, visit their funding page on kickstarter, read more, and help them out if you can.

Lets meet the characters behind the art.

I know why the doughnut man smiles

Yesterday I was at the right place at the right time, with the right amount of money (1.50 Euros) to buy the last doughnut from Barcelona’s famous doughnut man. I had just taken the first bite of my doughnut when a man called out.

Doughnut man: Sorry that was my last one. I’m sorry little one. Tomorrow you can get my first doughnut.

Good-natured cries of disappointment go up. A little 3 year old boy looks devastated. I feel horrible.

Me (whispering to the doughnut man): I’ll share half with him, if they like.

Doughnut man: Would you like to have half a doughnut?

Both parents shake their heads ‘no’. Behind them, the little boy shakes his head vigorously ‘yes’.

I beckon to him and he comes running over, and we split the doughnut. He stands next to me looking a bit uncertain. I smile at him. He leans in, and gently kisses me on the cheek.

Awwww!

The doughnut man is laughing at me.

Doughnut man: Now you know! Now you know!

Me: What?

Doughnut man: Now you know what it feels like for me, to get a kiss and thank you at work every day!

Que bien Bambolino!

This is the doughnut man in action. He also featured in Shakira’s video which she filmed in Barcelona in 2010.

The Guard or in Spanish El Irlandés

This summer been a season of bad movies. From badly executed super hero movies to __(insert name of favorite Disney movie)___ part 8 or 9, it’s all been a load of shite!

There is a good movie in cinemas though, and it’s called The Guard! It’s one of my top ten funny movies, right up there with Kickass and In Bruges. In fact the writer and director of The Guard, John Michael McDonagh, is the brother of the director of In Bruges, Martin McDonagh.

The hero of The Guard, is a provincial Irish policeman (played by Brendan Gleeson) with a blithe habit of racial stereotyping, a taste for drugs and hookers and a tendency towards honesty. This is Irish humour at it’s darkest and funniest.

If you want to watch a real movie this summer, watch The Guard.

You can watch the movie in English at the Version Original (VO) cinemas: Verdi in Gracia or Renoir on Florida Blanca.

Eid-al-fitr, the end of Ramadan and the start of food!

Eid mubarak everyone, it’s the end of Ramadan!

The whole neighborhood was buzzing last night. One long month of temper tantrums has ended at last. Praise be to Allah!

Men, think your girlfriends are scary on PMS? Bitch please! Try hanging out in a neighborhood full of cranky, starving, paranoid hash dealers. It’s a bit like going for a walk in a park full of rabid Chihuahuas. All bark and no teeth…..but my god there is a lot of yapping.

Yet today, I bet you could score freebies of these Dr.Jekylls. It’s all peace on earth and goodwill to mankind with beaming smiles and brotherly back pats. Their bellies are full of food and blood full of THC.

Personally, I’m out to score something way superior to drugs.

The Eid biriyani.

It is a thing of beauty.

Just remembering South Indian style biriyani is making my stomach growl. I haven’t eaten all day, and I can’t get the thought or smell of biriyani out of my mind. I’m going to get really cranky in a minute if somebody doesn’t give me some freakin biriyani!

Or I may just give up and make it myself. So here you have, my grandmother’s biriyani recipe, emailed to me by my mom with her annotations. I’ve added a few of mine.

MUMMY’S PATTI’S SPECIAL BIRIYANI

Ingredients
(to be adjusted according to the amount of rice you use)

Rice——1 kg (2.2 lbs) approximately 8 cups ( Clearly a time of big meals for big families)

Oil—-1/4 the amount of rice say 2 cups (you can reduce this) + 1 tblps of ghee, (clarified butter) to add some flavor

Meat————————————-1 kg
Coconut milk—————————–1 cup
Cinnamon———————————6
Lavang, (cloves)—————–12
Tej Patha (bay leaves)———–a few
Onions———————————–300 gms (sliced long)
Garlic———————————–250 gms (paste) (reduce according to taste)
Green chillies—————————20 slit
Ginger———————————-2 inches (paste)
Coriander leaves————————a few
Haldi (turmeric)—————– a pinch
cashew nuts—— 250 gms
Kariapatta (curry leaves) and salt to taste

Water/Liquid 16 cups (always double the quantity of rice): this includes the coconut milk and the water residue from the mutton cooked. Always measure this out in a separate dish.

METHOD

Cook meat with salt and haldi and a little ghee separately.

Put the oil and ghee in a pot, add all spices, then the onions and fry till they are red, then add the garlic and fry a little. Pour the water into the reddened onions and garlic. Add the green chillies and ginger, a little coriander leaves, karipatta, and salt to taste (very important). I was notorious for cooking meals without salt

When this comes to a boil add the rice and a pinch of haldi and the cashews.

Wait till the water has boiled down to the stage where it is almost under the level of rice (you will see only a few bubbles coming through the rice). At this stage add the cooked meat, mix it thoroughly into the rice and then lower the flame to just a simmer. Put an airtight lid on the pot and check it every 10 min to see if the rice is cooked.

If you have an oven you can put the dish into the oven (this is how Patti does it)

Note:

The water quantity should be exact (i.e. double the rice, and should include coconut milk etc.)

If you add too much water you will end up with a soup like Patti did when she was young and thatha (my grandfather) and his friends had to drink the biriyani from cups!

Tip: Serve it with Raita, which is onions chopped and mixed with natural yogurt. You can also add grated cucumber and chopped tomatoes to the raita.

Bon provecho!

Now you have our knowledge. Use it wisely.

Put off that red light?

Thanks to Bri from Barcelona Street Scraps for the theme of this post.

Yesterday the Ajuntament (local council) of Barcelona launched its anti-prostitution drive. Prostitution is legal in Spain, but Barcelona made it illegal in April 2012.

Not that anyone can tell the difference.

The first time I walked into the Raval I remember the shock of suddenly finding myself in the midst of hooker alley (Nou de la Rambla between Carrer Nou de Sadurni and Carrer d’En Robador). Paris’ Pigale looked like a broadway musical compared this gritty corner of the Raval.

Yet now, the girls are just part of the street scape for residents, be it the suspicious Nigerian girls who scowl at me when I say hola, or the girl who wears tinsel around her thighs for Christmas or the wizened old 4 1/5 foot tall lady in cowboy boots. They all seem as much part of the barrio as the skateboarding hipsters (damn them and their coolness), the faintly lecherous and faintly disapproving Pakistani shop keepers and the walking inebriated.

However, the government didn’t go and build a nice big Filmoteca, exactly on hooker alley for the entertainment of the ladies or their punters. No siree, this is all part of the ‘esponjament (mopping up) Raval’ operation. A legacy of the city’s pre-olympic rush to wipe it’s nose and straighten it’s collar.

Enter operation ‘Anti prostitution’.

So, gentlemen take heed; According to the expatica website, under the new laws the client faces fines from 1,000 to 1,500 euros and the lady or tranny faces fines from 100 to 750 if caught. The difference in fines depends on your proximity to a school when the ‘soliciting’ takes place. Less than 200 feet from a school, and you have been a VERY bad boy! If you decide to save on the cost of a hotel room by doing it in the street like these douche bags, you get fined 3,000 Euros.

The prostitute can avoid her fine if she attends the government’s ‘stop being such a dirty whore’ course.

On April 26th this year prostitutes protested the criminalization of their trade. They call themselves the Prostitutas Indignadas, part of the 99%.

Criminalization? Sounds like another excuse for a fine if you ask me. The disingenuous answer to the question- How do we fill this gap in the government budget?

But at the same time, for every fantastic, hideously kinky Monica del Raval style prostitute proudly strutting her stuff out there, and every glamorous Bel De Jour style high class hooker doing it because it makes her lotsa money, there are ten doe eyed, coal black teenage beauties who look like this world never gave them a fucking break, not since the moment they first opened their baby eyes.

So while criminalization isn’t the answer, support is needed for sex slaves and women who want out. After all, hasn’t it been possible to protect people from enslavement in other professions like farming and garment production without making the entire profession illegal?

The Ajuntament has made encouraging noises in this respect.

They have increased funding for the Agency for a Comprehensive Approach to Sex Workers (ABITS) by 67%. The agency provides training resources to prostitutes wishing to find another job. With the new funding it is going to set up a special division for African women who need more intensive support.

Question is dear government, what help can an illegal immigrant prostitute access without fear of deportation?

All photographs by Joan Colom, La gente de Raval

Monica del Raval: Autobiography of a whore

Monica Del Raval is a documentary of a prostitute who came to Barcelona and made the Raval her home.

Monica herself is, well ‘eye-catching’ to say the least. The documentary is long, and narrates most of her life. I can’t say that I liked it beyond the excitement of watching the Raval on camera, but it does give an interesting perspective of our little world. I watched it last year in preparation of all things, for a job interview.

For some reason, at the time I watched it I thought it was a docu-drama with imaginary characters. I was wrong. Last night, bathed in the bright strobe of another aspiring film maker, the lady herself walked past us on the terrace. She was wearing the same red dress as in the picture below. Monica del Raval is real!

Watch the documentary for free on the Culture Unplugged website.

Chasing Wabi-Sabi in the garden

For the last week or so, I’ve been house-sitting for some friends who live in the tiny village of Alella, near the coastal village of El Masnou. It’s been a week of slow living, and a week of luxurious living, due largely to the little pool in the backyard.

I’ve enjoyed the novelty of living in a real house, a grown-up house. They even have grown-up books to read.

I read one last night called Wabi-Sabi for Artists, Designers, Poets and Philosophers. It’s an introduction to a Japanese aesthetic called Wabi-Sabi. It’s a funny little book and the author, Leonard Koren deserves a lot of credit for keeping it short.

As to how well he describes the philosophy, I can’t say since I’m not Japanese and my knowledge of Japanese culture is appalling.

According to him:

Wabi-sabi is a beauty of things imperfect, impermanent, and incomplete.

It is a beauty of things modest and humble.

It is a beauty of things unconventional.

Inspired by this book, and a lack of cable TV, I took my camera into the garden. I don’t know what it was about the philosophy, but it ended up being the most fun I’ve had taking pictures for a while.

Tomorrow, I return to madness.